April Poetry Fundraiser

Day 3

Playlist 
by Mandy Berry

For Lily and Lee 

Five months ago
thirty scarring mistakes ago
you sent me a Spotify playlist
via text message
said,
“I don’t know if you like this music,
but maybe you’ll feel better
after you listen to it.”

It turned out to be
such sweet
painful, beautiful
catharsis
Now I use it
almost every week

all-purpose armor
shielding my soul
from the discord within me

And then, this evening
another friend messaged me
said,
“My legs are weak
I feel sick
I don’t want to eat
I don’t want to exist.”

I recognized it
the desperate and dejected
and whispered

“Help me.”

So I gave him the armor
I sent him the playlist…
and I have the feeling
that those nine tracks will shield him
through a lot.

 

****

 

Toilets
by S.A. Bowden

The toilet by my bedroom is backed up
It has been this way since yesterday morning
When my business clogged the pipe
I took the black and yellow plunger
And I flushed and flushed
Shoving air down the pipe over and over
To no avail
Just like how the seeds I planted in a pot in the library
Never grew into flowers
Though I watered and watered, hoping and hoping, over and over
To no avail
Now I think about myself and I realize
I too am buried and silent and cannot grow
Though this place is wet with my tears unshed
They get shoved deep down
Keep my business to myself
Clog me from the inside
Can’t bloom, can’t get it out, no avail
Why should my flowers and my toilet be any different?
I went to the bathroom during AP calculus BC today
Partly because I am tired of so-called trigonometric delights
Substitutions, functions, properties, formulas
Looking for a general term, a proof, a solution
To no avail
I locked the door and sat on the toilet

And the walls of the stall were tall and imposing and gray

 

 

****

 

 

Inadequate
by Cindy Ibarra

Lately I’ve been seeing the world differently
And it just might be accidentally
But everyone I pass lately gives me the look of hate
Like I’m inadequate
Because of my race
Because of my caramel skin
I love who I am
I just can’t wrap my head into the idea that there are people out there who
Don’t appreciate diverse
That don’t want to see my flair
Just want me elsewhere
Because of who I am
But I wouldn’t want to change me for nothing
That’s what makes me who I am
****

 

A Mistake
by Kasongo Pembamoto

She was born as a couple getting a divorce.
Blames herself, her whole life.
There’s no story,
God doesn’t make mistakes.
Whips, wires, spanks and torture!
She can’t escape!
Daddy offered to take her in.
Momma said “No, you take one you take all”
With a big shake in her itty- bitty body
Her older brother is of no help
Getting drunk and not taking care of his baby girl.

She believes in the one who sits above,
But she’s afraid to make that one phone call.
Art and music, her way to express her feelings,
Only way she can clear her mind.
Classic and elegant, how she dresses,
Who she prefers to be.
Momma wanted her to dress her age,
Not someone with no social life
Not someone who only takes pride in their work.
Beatings, chains and knives!
No way out!

She took responsibilities momma should be doing.
Every time something goes wrong momma blames her,
Takes it out on her
Knives to her neck
Spankings to her rear-end
Torture to her insides
She asks everyday “Is there any love for me in her heart?”
She tried with everything in her bones to love momma.
But momma never understand what she was doing.
Momma never looked up to the one above.

Her neighbor was her only support
Who understood what she was going through
Everytime she came home her
neighbor would be sitting on a chair or standing in the doorway
But now they had moved.
Her birthday was around the worst time.
Momma does nothing but complain.
She was never alone.
Beatings and Chains, Knives and Spanks, Whips and Wires!
Torture!

She always thought “Is there anyway out now?”
To leave this world without any goodbyes.
To cause no more problems, with one she faced.
Step-Daddy seems of a little help, but close to none.
Compared to what her friends have done.

Her siblings were also born as a teenager getting a tattoo.
They were never tortured like her.
Her siblings loved momma.
But momma couldn’t even stick around them for an hour.
They would play and have fun,
But they never seen the side she had seen.

To this day, she stands by the side of her friends.
She is amazed that today we are still at her left and right.
She thought that we couldn’t handle it,
She thought her problems would become our problems.
We told her “She was never alone”.
When her friends knew something was not right.
They would talk on the phone for times being.
To this day, She waits for the age to leave,
The one who told her “Baby girl, You were all born as mistakes!”

****

Ode to Music 
by Mya Smith

You have so many genres, and I love

Every one of them.

You have the hip-hop, R&B, rock,

Alternative, pop, gospel, classical,

May I add more?

You are my getaway every day.mya

I go to you when I’m sad, happy,

Moody, upset, joyous…

The can go on for days.

When I put my earphones in

And just blast you on maximum volume,

I go into your world and appreciate your sound.

I appreciate you, and this is my ode to you.

 

****

 

Breathe 
by Sam Yoseph

I reach out and grasp your hand.
Within your doubt, you start to stand.

And then you fall into the sea.
I just need you to hold on to me.

I bring you up to help you swim.
You cannot let the water in.

It overflows. It overkills
People holding dying wills.

But I’m here, as I’ll be.
And soon you’ll think of me.

You’ll fill up with emotion
as you climb out of the ocean,

and take a breath of fresh air.
You will get somewhere.

Trust me I can see
All the things you’re meant to be.

Sometimes you will fall
But you’ll get through it all.

And I’m sorry to be rude
I don’t mean to sound prude,

But my name is Life.
Depression won’t take you.

 

 

 

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